There are lots of different ways multicultural families deal with diversity during milestones. Personally, I believe that our son is Canadian and Korean, and I feel very strongly that both of those elements of his identity need to be honoured throughout his life. However, I think there’s a longer and stronger tradition of incoporating other cultures into Canadian culture than there is bringing Canadian elements into Korean culture, and I think there are fewer models for those of us trying to do so in Korea. Therefore, when we started thinking about planning Dragon’s dol, I decided that I wanted his party to have Canadian elements and that I wanted the party to represent our family (which is maybe a Canadian idea in and of itself).
The first area where I thought we could make such changes within the structure of the Korean dol party was with the fortune telling event. This is probably the most iconic part of the contemporary dol and a part that I really love. In this ritual, a number of items are placed before the baby, and the item the child picks is said to indicate his or her future. The items change depending on the venue and the parents, but they often include a combination of the following:
Money – (Wealth)
Thread – (Long life)
Rice – (Lots of food)
Calligraphy brush (traditional)/pencil (modern) – (Scholar)
Archery bow (traditional) /golf ball (modern) – (Sports star)
Stethoscope – (Doctor)
Gavel – (Lawyer/Judge)
Microphone – (Celebrity)
I figured it would be pretty easy to either put a slight twist on the traditional items or include some additional ones that reflected our own family. So we chose:
Concert bands from Mr. Lee’s favourite festivals (musician)
Cow (veternarian – because my sister is in vet school, and we are an animal loving family)
Hockey puck – (hockey player – the team my family supports, and we received this toy puck on our family trip to Boston in the summer)
Money – (Wealth – Canadian $10 bill + Korean 10,000 won)
Pens (Scholar – we had planned to put pens from our undergraduate alma maters and my current place of employment together, but we couldn’t get a pen from Mr. Lee’s school, so 2 out of 3).
Rope – (Long life – from our traditional wedding altar…the dol party rope is usually white)
When guests arrive at a dol, they are given a ticket and asked to choose which item they think the baby will choose. If the baby chooses the item you predicted, you are entered in a contest to win a prize.
I’m sure it’s the first time the venue ever had to print off this label.
And then there was this. ㅋㅋㅋ
Our emcee explained to the guests why we chose each item, and I think this change to the ritual was well received.
So what did Dragon pick?…..
Our son is going to be a wealthy man! Or…maybe as Mr. Lee mused…chosing the money means that he is going to use up all of our money! ㅋㅋㅋ
I love the way you included Canadian elements into this Korean tradition
I’m going to have to think how to do the same in my multicultural family in the future (European and Chinese) … 
I don’t know if it is from the Irish or German or polish sides in my family but we do something similar for the one year birthday. Only it is money, shot glass, rosary.
Do you think multicultural families that have a child as opposed to those that don’t have stronger need to incorporate both cultures? Has it changed for you since you got a child, or have you always felt it is important to honor your Canadian culture?
I think it really depends on the situation and the people. I know families here that live a very Western existance and friends back home who live very much like they are in another country, but then I know a couple bicultural families here who are very Korean. Personally, I feel that both cultures are important, and I think that living here, I need to be more mindful of how to bring up my child Canadian because I’m the only person who can influence that part of him. If were were living in Canada, I would expect ‘the village’ to bring up Dragon as Canadian, and I would focus more on how to incorporate Korean culture into our lives. I think the biggest challenge at this point for our family is that in Canada I grew up seeing other cultures being brought into Canadian family/social life, but there’s far fewer models as to how to be Canadian and Korean in a Korean family/in Korean society.
I understand what you mean. So far neither my boyfriend nor I made any attempts to bring culture into our relationships. Maybe that is because we both grew up in towns where only culture we could ever see is our own. It is certainly different in Canada where there are many immigrants.
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